I constantly hear women complain about men being assholes, CHEATERS, irresponsible, and disrespectful. Well if that is true...why are you sleeping with them? There are many problems in the dating world. Some problems are larger than others.
The main problem is that many women do not know how to pick men because it's a new "science". For thousands of years and still in many cultures fathers and the family picked the male companion for their daughters. As women won their rights they took on responsibilities they were supposed to be groomed and equipped to handle. As a society we failed. Father's are absent to teach their daughters what a "real" man is supposed to look like. Mother's are too jaded to tell their daughters the truth about why the father is not there, so she doesn't equip her daughter to find a good man. And worst of all, the Females at early ages refused to listen to the good people in their lives who tried to instruct them insisting on being stubborn and hard headed and relying on the mantras created by other hard headed and stubborn people like " you live and you learn, you don't know until you try, you have to kiss a few frogs before you get your prince, etc). These sayings can be applied to any foolhardy endeavor whether it be burning your hand on a stove, having unprotected sex with an HIV infected person, or jumping from a plane without a parachute.
Reality is that the good man was rarely the most attractive and obviously he couldn't be the richest(there can only be a few)...he was the normal hardworking man who respected women and cared about society and was self sufficient. Today women chase the dream and not reality. They refuse to listen to older women who tell them to find a good man in their 20's. Instead they chase or allow themselves to be caught by athletes, entertainers, hustlers, and other men with money who use them up. So what if she learns in her 30's what she should have learned in her 20's, does that reverse her biological clock or the fact that medical science may have to intervene for them to have children? Does it change the fact that birth defects are more likely to present themselves the older a woman is when she becomes pregnant. At what point are men supposed to ignore those things just because women choose to be hard headed in their 20's and when their back is against the wall they start lowering ridiculous standards in order to find true happiness and not just material happiness. Most women will realize that any man of good quality is confident and confident men do not want to be a beautiful woman's second or third choice in her advanced age when she was his first choice in her 20's. He will move on and date a younger woman who may have listened to her elder and therefore may be wiser and recognize a good man when she sees him.
These are blunt and painful truths that many women don't want to hear but nevertheless they must hear. Older women and men were supposed to have told women this. What normally happens is women will become defensive and say something mean or cite examples of women having children in their 40's etc. Yet they will not tell you the medical issues that came with these pregnancies, because they are only told of the success and NOT the pain and failures. The women will blame the men...it's not just the men, it's the women. In life we run around scared of the word "settle". We all "settle". Whether it's your job, the home you buy, the person you marry, the car you drive. Settling means you are making a decision and going with it. Too many people would rather remain indecisive or they refuse to decide based on the right criteria, and they end up sticking with their poor decision. We all believe we deserve more. Most of us deserve what we are getting. Opportunity is when CHANCE and PREPARATION meet. How many women are prepared for the opportunity of meeting a good man?
Women now have they same responsibility that men have historically had. They must be responsible when choosing a mate. No longer will society accept the cop out that" he deceived me", "lied to me", or "he used me". If there was a reason to believe that he would do those things before you dealt with him and you decided to deal with him anyway, you are at fault. A snake is a snake. It's your choice whether or not you choose to domesticate a snake. Men have long been told you can't turn a whore into a housewife. Well Ladies, you can't turn a bad man into a father or a husband. However, you can turn one into your baby daddy and in turn allow him to turn you into a negative statistic.
Friday, September 24, 2010
TEXT in the City: What Carrie Bradshaw Didn’t Tell You About REAL Men
It always strikes me as odd that some women are using biblical terms when looking for men, but not biblical behavior. Maybe they don't realize that God never intended a woman to be searching for a man nor did he intend for her to dictate to a man what he must do to be with her. Many women assume men are listening to her words, but in truth we are observing her actions. We recognize deceit and gamesmanship, even in it's smallest forms. If she treats us like an option and not a priority, we recognize it. If she says she is not materialistic, but she continuously shows off her expensive items, we recognize that. If she says she wants to be treated like a queen but she is constantly being dogged out by men of bad character, we recognize it. Her actions will speak louder than her words and most of the time they have spoken for her long before thinks they have, whether she knows it or not. A real man will recognize a real woman. We have a blueprint. We know what her actions should look like. Her stated desires and her actions must be CONSISTENT with one another. You can't be looking for a king but playing house with the pawns.
Whether it was Proverbs 31:3-31, Ephesians 5:22-29, or 1 Corinthians 13:4-10.....there is a Blueprint laid out for how a woman should act, how a man should love a woman, how a woman should love and respect a man, and how love should look between a man and a woman. We have a blueprint for the rough days. 1 Corinthians tells us how to love and what should not infect or poison our love. Everything else outside of the WORD is media influenced hype that has lead to the increased divorce rates, illegitimate children, women with broken hearts, jaded men and women, and weak men who don't know how to love a woman. How could any man say "we don't need to be married, it's just a piece of paper" if he actually cares about himself. As a man, I am loving you as I love myself and as man loves the church....so there is no need to run from marriage. Real men run towards marriage, not away from it. Marital Unions are threefold. 1). It is a Union between Man and Woman in the Eyes of God that has biblical rules. 2). It is a legally recognized contract that gives each partner rights and legitimizes children. 3). It is a declaration of your commitment to your spouse that is being shared and witnessed by your community. Marriage is a beautiful and sacred union. Why are people playing married, when you can follow the blueprint to get married. If he won't marry you, there is a man who will. The excuse of poor selection only exists for women who have been influenced to select men based on a media marketed criteria. You can't always get everything that you want. You must prioritize. Is the union more important than the Fairytale wedding? Is the character of the knight more important than the shiny armor that he wears? How thirsty will you become before you choose to drink the Aquafina that is provided instead of the Evian you are waiting for? Your choices speak volumes about you and what actually drives you.
We have the rules and the blueprint. At some point we need to stop remixing the bible. If a woman wants a godly man, she needs to act accordingly so that he may find her. Matthew 7:6 warns women about dealing with the wrong men.....and yet these issues are still around. Many women make up every excuse for their poor judgment and their lack of patience. Why can't women simply read Matthew 7:6 which says "Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and then turn and tear you to pieces."---This is Matthew 7:6 and this is knowledge that we overlook. This oversight is why women are looking for a man instead of making themselves available and attractive to a man looking for his rib. No man wants a woman who has made a habit of giving dogs what is sacred, because after those dogs have torn her to pieces she is no longer the virtuous woman that the wise mother instructed her son to find in Proverbs 31. Some men will try to put her back together, but the wise men will read Proverbs 7:7-27 and will stay away from her. The media can tell a woman what she should want to look like. The media can even empower a women to be hypersexual in order to feel empowered and strong. Ladies there is a simple truth. The bible has already told women what a god fearing man seeking to be equally yoked will desire. A woman can go watch and follow the examples of Sex in the City all she likes, but if she really wants to find a good man, she may want to follow and apply the Text in the City.
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
CAN A REAL MAN BE A GOOD MAN AND STILL WIN HIS DREAM GIRL?
CAN A REAL MAN BE A GOOD MAN AND STILL WIN HIS DREAM GIRL?
THIS BLOG WAS WRITTEN TO ASK A REAL QUESTION FROM A MALE'S POINT OF VIEW
CAN A REAL MAN BE A GOOD MAN AND STILL WIN HIS DREAM GIRL, OR MUST HE PLAY THE STEREOTYPICAL PLAYER ROLE AND THEN CHANGE ONCE HE HAS WON HER?
I spoke with a group of single, hardworking, and educated men who date frequently. We spoke about the issues that plague real men who are trying to be the good men our families raised us to be. Generally our consensus was that the women of today do not respect REAL men. They only deem a man as being good, if he is doing what they want him to do. During the conversation, many things came up that unanimously upset the group. These were some of the things that upset the group the most.
1. The RIDICULOUS rule about a man waiting to call a few days so he doesn't seem desperate or needy. Here are a few reasons why that is a horrible rule.
A. A real man seizes the day and if you are the most important thing on his mind, that is a good thing. If you start your relationship off with him having to schedule time for you on his blackberry so that he doesn't seem too eager, don't be surprised when down the road you are dealing with the same issue. Scheduling to speak to a woman later is something PLAYERS do, not REAL men. A real man may even call or text you the night he met you to make sure you made it home safely, that's what our mother's taught us to do
B. If I have to wait that long to speak to you, who is to say I will not meet someone else. Finding the right person is not fate or luck, it's preparation and desire. If you don't believe me, go to an area where the women outnumber the men and see how many women don't have men. Are they all unlucky or do they need to relocate. The saying a needle in the haystack will describe your chances of finding a good man, if you keep waiting. Male and Female numbers are just that...NUMBERS. Skew them to your favor. When you find a good dude, why screw it up with the waiting game? If you play the waiting game it sends a signal that obviously his time is not valuable to you or he is not valuable to you. When you want something and it's there why not get it. No one tears up a lottery ticket and says "it was fun winning, but if it's meant to be I will win it again" NO....THEY CASH IT IN AND ENJOY LIFE.
C.The last one is simple...What makes you think you're stalkable by every man you meet? ARE YOU HALLE, ANGELINA, BEYONCE, NO WAIT YOU'RE DENISE RICHARDS, CARMEN ELECTRA, SELMA HAYEK, EVA MENDES....NO...HMMMM....So you're none of these women huh....wellllll then just because you're beautiful doesn't mean every man will stalk you...because guess what... beautiful women are not hard to find, but a man who doesn't want to "just have sex with you" is very hard to find. When you are a conquest men will spoil you, wine and dine you, and promise you the world, because they know that is the opposite of what you need, but it's exactly what you want. Men do a lot of things to just get between a woman's legs...that doesn't mean he wants to wife you, he may just want to tonight you. So why put stumbling blocks in front of yourself. Men decide within the first few days of knowing a woman whether or not she is wife material. If you start playing the game in the beginning of dating...ANY GAME....you may end up a notch on his bedpost and bitter. How you get him is how you keep him. If you start off on a solid foundation your relationship house will last when relationship storms come, but if you start off as a conquest he has to chase....ONCE HE CATCHES YOU HE MAY BE OFF TO THE NEXT CONQUEST. A lot of women (and I do mean a lot) think they can change that in a man...GOOD LUCK...many have failed.
2. When a woman swears she is not about money, but she gets star struck around movie stars, athletes, and rappers. A moment of silence please....Um you my dear will set off golddiger radar for most men, which will almost certainly place you in Conquest territory, not Wifeyville. Here's why:
A. You don't know that man from can of paint, but you are willing to sit with him, talk to him, sleep with him and do whatever he asks. Men see these women in the club and we remember it. We say amongst one another "she don't know anything about this dude and he is just in town for one night...wow I thought she was better than that". The athlete,star, or rapper can leave town, and most likely your respect left with him. Men talk...we talk more than women. If we see or hear of you playing yourself, we remember it well. No man wants to walk around feeling like his girl can be bought off by a shopping spree at Bergdorf's. As men get older we accumulate money, our circles have money....and the quickest way to attack a man is through his woman...NO MAN WANTS A WEAK MATERIALISTIC WOMAN.
B. A woman who chases one of these men belittles the man she will actually date longterm by saying that there is someone higher than him. No man wants to be Mr. Reliable, he wants to be your fantasy. If you expose that he is not your fantasy, I guarantee you this... if you were his fantasy, you will not be his fantasy any longer.
3. THE LARGEST PET PEEVE OF ALL THE MEN (IT'S LAST DUE TO THE PAINFUL MEMORIES A LOT OF MEN HAD ON THE SUBJECT)----WE HATE THE FAIRWEATHER FEMALE.....This is the female who only rides when the money is flowing but while you were in school she dated others and got at you around graduation or after you started making money. Look we get it...stability is nice. But here is why that approach is wrong:
A. Would you want a man to bail out on you if you got fat or you couldn't pay for your half of every meal?
B. Would you be mad if he expected you to cook and clean and play the stereotypical role that most females avoid like the plague?
C.How can you claim equal rights and not accept equal responsibility? IF YOU SAY YOU DO....I GOT TWO WORDS FOR YOU---ENGAGEMENT RING----WHY DOESN'T A MAN GET ONE? Society has traditionally placed a man in a PROVIDER'S role, but all the privileges that came with that role have been stripped away. So if you don't need to be there as a man's support system while he is making his way to the top...WHY SHOULD HE WANT YOU ONCE HE GETS THERE? NO MAN WANTS TO GIVE UP HALF HIS WORTH BECAUSE OF THE FAIRWEATHER FEMALE.....So if you show that you are fairweather....you might end up a bedpost notch...and for the record WE DECIDE THAT VERY QUICKLY DURING THE DATING PROCESS.....a man recognizes game....he decides if he wants to play or not....the best at it become PLAYERS...and the eventually the real men refuse to play and they refuse to take anyone serious who decides she is going to play.
WHY AM I SAYING THIS YOU MIGHT ASK....well summer starts soon...and men will begin to get distracted by all of the things that women are showing at the club, in the streets, on the beaches, etc. Many men will leave their women during this time. Women will then realize that there are bad men all around and unless you are gonna change your tactics, you're bound to have things blow up in your face. Good men DO exist. Do you know what a good man looks like???
Monday, April 26, 2010
A NATION OF COWARDS...What we are afraid to say in Public.
A Nation of Cowards
As I walk around and observe the landscape, I often ask myself are we in some respect a nation of cowards. I don’t mean a nation of people who are afraid of war or to fight physical wars, I mean a nation of people who are afraid of doing what’s right when the time calls for it. Have we ever had the “race discussion”? Have we ever addressed “homosexuality” and the stigma surrounding it? Why are we afraid to say men and women were created differently for different purposes? Why do we allow ourselves to become jaded and refuse to speak up or protect our fellow citizens even if there is potential backlash? Why are we afraid to speak up and tell parents to respect and raise their child? Has America turned into a country that would rather “mind its own business”, than to help those who need our help? I love my country, but I am fearful of the country we are becoming.
The destruction of any Monument usually begins at the Foundation. America was built on a Foundation of camaraderie, intervention when necessary, and responsible citizenship. This foundation allowed us to build a Monument of Freedom and Democracy for the world to see. Slowly, our apathetic mindsets have allowed laziness, fear, and cowardice to chip away at our Foundation. If we can’t stand up and fight against the legislation that will cripple us, corporations that will bankrupt us, Government that refuses to protect us, and people who care more about their bank accounts than doing what’s right, are we the same America we used to be?
Since when have we made excuses for not educating our children? Equal Access to Education and Equal Access to Health Care are the civil rights issues of the 21st century. These two issues determine your altitude and your longevity. If you find an elected official who refuses to champion either cause, no matter their color, vote them out of office. There is more at stake than racial similarities. Our children are the future of America. When a country becomes so fearful and so cowardly that they refuse to protect their children, they are doomed to fail. America was the home of innovation and we were once the World’s largest Super Power. We are living on borrowed time. When China owns our debt and India and other foreign countries are loaning us their intellectuals through work visas, we will soon learn the most valuable of lessons. That lesson is simple, “If you don’t take care of your home, no one else will”. I don’t care who makes what political contributions. IF YOU DON’T INVEST IN AMERICA IMMEDIATELY, WE WILL FAIL. There is no excuse on education and health care. We started the printing presses to add more money to the economy, but we refused to invest in our greatest resources, our children. Yet, there are no marches. No one is in the streets screaming about the children of the major cities and forgotten cities. Who cries for the low income student, which due to the greed of the banks will include more and more students every day? When will we stop being a Nation of Cowards? Are we really afraid to say Pump billions into education now and pump billions into health care now, or you will not get re-elected? The people have the power to call for special elections. Maybe it’s time we close our borders, stop importing intellectual and manual labor, and strengthen our schools and health care system, so that we may have smarter children who live longer and will be able to find work in America. IF AIG GETS ANOTHER DOLLAR BEFORE THE SCHOOL DISTRICTS OF MICHIGAN ARE BAILED OUT, there should be political blood in the street. That blood should spill from the death of the political careers of all those who would sell the American people out for profit.
I love America. This is the same country that was built on insurrection and resistance. Where are the brave hearts and minds that are willing to say what is needed to say despite the fact they may not get re-elected because big donors will not support their campaigns? Cowardice is defined as a “lack of courage or resolution”. Political cowardice runs rampant in Washington D.C., people are more afraid of upsetting their party, donors, and friends then they are of serving the people. Abraham Lincoln once said, “To sin by silence when they should protest makes cowards of men.” So I guess in the eyes of Lincoln we are cowards, because knowing what’s wrong and continuing on with your life after Election Day as if that was enough is not enough to create real change. Change is not a slogan; it is a mindset and a goal. We should secure our borders, create tax shelters that enable the manufacturing sector of America to return, fix Education and Health Care, and stop bowing to the leaders of other countries. We are Americans damnit…It’s time we act like it.
As I walk around and observe the landscape, I often ask myself are we in some respect a nation of cowards. I don’t mean a nation of people who are afraid of war or to fight physical wars, I mean a nation of people who are afraid of doing what’s right when the time calls for it. Have we ever had the “race discussion”? Have we ever addressed “homosexuality” and the stigma surrounding it? Why are we afraid to say men and women were created differently for different purposes? Why do we allow ourselves to become jaded and refuse to speak up or protect our fellow citizens even if there is potential backlash? Why are we afraid to speak up and tell parents to respect and raise their child? Has America turned into a country that would rather “mind its own business”, than to help those who need our help? I love my country, but I am fearful of the country we are becoming.
The destruction of any Monument usually begins at the Foundation. America was built on a Foundation of camaraderie, intervention when necessary, and responsible citizenship. This foundation allowed us to build a Monument of Freedom and Democracy for the world to see. Slowly, our apathetic mindsets have allowed laziness, fear, and cowardice to chip away at our Foundation. If we can’t stand up and fight against the legislation that will cripple us, corporations that will bankrupt us, Government that refuses to protect us, and people who care more about their bank accounts than doing what’s right, are we the same America we used to be?
Since when have we made excuses for not educating our children? Equal Access to Education and Equal Access to Health Care are the civil rights issues of the 21st century. These two issues determine your altitude and your longevity. If you find an elected official who refuses to champion either cause, no matter their color, vote them out of office. There is more at stake than racial similarities. Our children are the future of America. When a country becomes so fearful and so cowardly that they refuse to protect their children, they are doomed to fail. America was the home of innovation and we were once the World’s largest Super Power. We are living on borrowed time. When China owns our debt and India and other foreign countries are loaning us their intellectuals through work visas, we will soon learn the most valuable of lessons. That lesson is simple, “If you don’t take care of your home, no one else will”. I don’t care who makes what political contributions. IF YOU DON’T INVEST IN AMERICA IMMEDIATELY, WE WILL FAIL. There is no excuse on education and health care. We started the printing presses to add more money to the economy, but we refused to invest in our greatest resources, our children. Yet, there are no marches. No one is in the streets screaming about the children of the major cities and forgotten cities. Who cries for the low income student, which due to the greed of the banks will include more and more students every day? When will we stop being a Nation of Cowards? Are we really afraid to say Pump billions into education now and pump billions into health care now, or you will not get re-elected? The people have the power to call for special elections. Maybe it’s time we close our borders, stop importing intellectual and manual labor, and strengthen our schools and health care system, so that we may have smarter children who live longer and will be able to find work in America. IF AIG GETS ANOTHER DOLLAR BEFORE THE SCHOOL DISTRICTS OF MICHIGAN ARE BAILED OUT, there should be political blood in the street. That blood should spill from the death of the political careers of all those who would sell the American people out for profit.
I love America. This is the same country that was built on insurrection and resistance. Where are the brave hearts and minds that are willing to say what is needed to say despite the fact they may not get re-elected because big donors will not support their campaigns? Cowardice is defined as a “lack of courage or resolution”. Political cowardice runs rampant in Washington D.C., people are more afraid of upsetting their party, donors, and friends then they are of serving the people. Abraham Lincoln once said, “To sin by silence when they should protest makes cowards of men.” So I guess in the eyes of Lincoln we are cowards, because knowing what’s wrong and continuing on with your life after Election Day as if that was enough is not enough to create real change. Change is not a slogan; it is a mindset and a goal. We should secure our borders, create tax shelters that enable the manufacturing sector of America to return, fix Education and Health Care, and stop bowing to the leaders of other countries. We are Americans damnit…It’s time we act like it.
10 THINGS TO MAKE YOUR RELATIONSHIP RUN SMOOTHLY
10 THINGS TO MAKE YOUR RELATIONSHIP RUN SMOOTHLY
1. KNOW YOUR MAN. Know his likes, dislikes, tendacies, and goals.
2. DESIRE TO PLEASE HIM. Desire to make him happy, even at your own expense, real men reciprocate
3. MELD YOUR DREAMS. If he loves politics and you love politics work together not apart. Build a foundation rooted in friendship and cemented in trust
4. IGNORE THE SMALL STUFF. Would you sell a Benz because it got mud on it? So why lose a great man over a blemish. 20 years waiting on Mr. Right means losing a quarter of your life you can’t get back. The best generals know what battles to fight and when to take the high ground. Give him guy time, ignore the toilet seat, laugh at things that might irritate you, it will pay off when he looks at you as being the woman who loves him despite his faults. That’s the woman he marries, not the the woman who nags and makes him act perfect all the time
5. ***BE HIS EVERYTHING IN THE BEDROOM***What you won’t do, another woman will. Yes, it’s true you can find another man, but is it worth it. You are gonna do it at sometime, with some man, why lose this one over something that you will regret later. You may laugh as you read this, but I guarantee you there is a woman right now in America who wishes she could get her Ex man back and is walking around with Volleyball Kneepads in her purse, hoping she finds him. Hindsight is always 20/20
6. RECOGNIZE HIS PROMISE AND FOSTER IT. No two women represent this more than Michelle Obama and Hillary Clinton. BOTH women were ahead of their men in law school and married someone who was behind them, they advised their men and were partners. Although Bill strayed, he has damned near destroyed his legacy trying to help her win the nomination, and no one can doubt the love and gratitude Barack has for Michelle.
7. CREATE THE MEMORIES. All relationships have their bad moments. When those moments arise, you will need to look back on the memories to get you through them. The fewer memories you have, the less likely it is you will survive turmoil
8. BE SECURE AND DEAL WITH YOUR OWN PAST BAGGAGE. Nothing upsets a man more than being accused of something he could do, but he isn’t doing because he loves you. This is a sure fire way of pushing him down temptation alley.
9. DON’T GET COMFORTABLE. Once you got him, remember how you got him. How you got him is how you keep him. So if you started cooking and cleaning, either keep doing it or start off sharing the responsibilities. A lack of effort often denotes a lack of desire, and if you don’t desire to make him happy he will see it and act accordingly
10. ********DON’T DO ANY OF THIS FOR A JERK OR A SELFISH MAN******* Just because he is educated, good looking and charming, doesn’t mean he has the right to mistreat you. Although you should overlook small things and do whatever it takes to please a good man, you can’t make snowballs in hell and you can’t make a man love you. Infidelity, abuse, disrespect, and dishonesty are not to be tolerated. So if he is a jerk or a selfish man, move on…
1. KNOW YOUR MAN. Know his likes, dislikes, tendacies, and goals.
2. DESIRE TO PLEASE HIM. Desire to make him happy, even at your own expense, real men reciprocate
3. MELD YOUR DREAMS. If he loves politics and you love politics work together not apart. Build a foundation rooted in friendship and cemented in trust
4. IGNORE THE SMALL STUFF. Would you sell a Benz because it got mud on it? So why lose a great man over a blemish. 20 years waiting on Mr. Right means losing a quarter of your life you can’t get back. The best generals know what battles to fight and when to take the high ground. Give him guy time, ignore the toilet seat, laugh at things that might irritate you, it will pay off when he looks at you as being the woman who loves him despite his faults. That’s the woman he marries, not the the woman who nags and makes him act perfect all the time
5. ***BE HIS EVERYTHING IN THE BEDROOM***What you won’t do, another woman will. Yes, it’s true you can find another man, but is it worth it. You are gonna do it at sometime, with some man, why lose this one over something that you will regret later. You may laugh as you read this, but I guarantee you there is a woman right now in America who wishes she could get her Ex man back and is walking around with Volleyball Kneepads in her purse, hoping she finds him. Hindsight is always 20/20
6. RECOGNIZE HIS PROMISE AND FOSTER IT. No two women represent this more than Michelle Obama and Hillary Clinton. BOTH women were ahead of their men in law school and married someone who was behind them, they advised their men and were partners. Although Bill strayed, he has damned near destroyed his legacy trying to help her win the nomination, and no one can doubt the love and gratitude Barack has for Michelle.
7. CREATE THE MEMORIES. All relationships have their bad moments. When those moments arise, you will need to look back on the memories to get you through them. The fewer memories you have, the less likely it is you will survive turmoil
8. BE SECURE AND DEAL WITH YOUR OWN PAST BAGGAGE. Nothing upsets a man more than being accused of something he could do, but he isn’t doing because he loves you. This is a sure fire way of pushing him down temptation alley.
9. DON’T GET COMFORTABLE. Once you got him, remember how you got him. How you got him is how you keep him. So if you started cooking and cleaning, either keep doing it or start off sharing the responsibilities. A lack of effort often denotes a lack of desire, and if you don’t desire to make him happy he will see it and act accordingly
10. ********DON’T DO ANY OF THIS FOR A JERK OR A SELFISH MAN******* Just because he is educated, good looking and charming, doesn’t mean he has the right to mistreat you. Although you should overlook small things and do whatever it takes to please a good man, you can’t make snowballs in hell and you can’t make a man love you. Infidelity, abuse, disrespect, and dishonesty are not to be tolerated. So if he is a jerk or a selfish man, move on…
10 MEN EDUCATED WOMEN SHOULD NOT DATE
10 MEN EDUCATED WOMEN SHOULD NOT DATE
1. A MAN WITHOUT A MORAL COMPASS
WHY---- WHETHER IT IS CHRISTIANITY, ISLAM, BUDDHISM, OR WHATEVER…. MOST ORGANIZED RELIGIONS STRESS HAVING A MORAL COMPASS AND HOW TO TREAT SOMEONE. EVEN IF YOUR MAN IS NOT RELIGIOUS HE NEEDS A MORAL COMPASS. A MAN WITHOUT A MORAL COMPASS WILL MOST LIKELY NOT RESPECT HIS WOMAN AND IS BEHOLDEN TO NO ONE. THIS MAN IS NOT PROHIBITED BY ANYTHING ONCE THEY FEEL THEY CAN ESCAPE SOCIETY'S LAW AND YOUR EYESIGHT….HE WILL CHEAT WITH ANYONE OR DO ANYTHING THAT FEELS PLEASURABLE.
2. A MAN WHO BELIEVES THAT HE HAS THE RIGHT TO TELL YOU WHERE TO GO, WHAT TO SAY, HOW TO ACT, WHAT TO WEAR, WHOM TO HANG AROUND, WHERE TO WORK, AND WHOM TO TALK TO
WHY----THIS MAN SEEKS TO CONTROL YOU. HE DOES NOT WANT A PARTNER HE WANTS A SUBORDINATE. YOU SHOULD MARRY A HUSBAND NOT YOUR FATHER. EVEN IF A MAN CAN GIVE YOU ADVICE TO BETTER YOUR LIFE IN AREAS YOU ARE WEAK, THAT ADVICE MUST BE WELCOMED AND EMBRACED. OTHERWISE, IT WILL FALL ON DEAF EARS AND RESENTMENT WILL BUILD INSIDE YOU TOWARDS HIM. YOU WILL LONG TO ESCAPE AND BE WITH SOMEONE WHO DOESN'T THINK THEY "KNOW EVERYTHING", AND THAT ESCAPE MAY LEAD YOU TO STRAY EMOTIONALLY AND EVENTUALLY MAYBE EVEN PHYSICALLY
3. A MAN WHO WOULD PUT HIS HANDS ON ANOTHER PERSON VERY EASILY
WHY----A MAN WHO WILL HIT SOMEONE ELSE EASILY, WILL ONE DAY HIT HIS WOMAN. THIS FOOL HAS LOST HIS EVER LOVING MIND AND DESERVES A ONE WAY TICKET TO THE HOSPITAL. IN TODAY'S SOCIETY TO PUT YOUR HANDS ON ANOTHER MAN WITHOUT FULLY UNDERSTANDING THE CONSEQUENCES DOESN'T MAKE YOU A THUG, IT MAKES YOU STUPID. THIS MAN HAS NO RESPECT FOR OTHER'S LIFE OR HIS OWN. HE IS A PRISONER OF HIS EMOTIONS AND HAS POOR IMPULSE CONTROL. HIS LACK OF IMPULSE CONTROL CAN LEAD HIM TO HITTING YOU(HIS WOMAN). IF A MAN EVER PUT HIS HANDS ON YOU AND IT HAS NOT BEEN PROVOKED BY A PHYSICAL ATTACK(AND I MEAN A SERIOUS PHYSICAL ATTACK), YOU MUST LEAVE HIM IMMEDIATELY AND NEVER LOOK BACK. HE IS A WEAK MAN AND CAN NOT BE TRUSTED. THIS MAN CAN NOT CONTROL HIS TEMPER AND ALL IT TAKES IS ONE PUNCH TO SEVERELY INJURE OR KILL A PERSON IF HE HITS YOU WRONG. LEAVE IMMEDIATELY AND NO MATTER HOW SORRY HE SAYS HE IS AND WHAT HE TRIES TO PROVIDE AS GIFTS….DO NOT GO BACK. ALL THE SORRIES IN THE WORLD CAN'T BRING YOU BACK IF YOU'RE DEAD OR BADLY INJURED.
4. A MAN WHO ALWAYS HAS A PLAN FOR SUCCESS BUT YOU NEVER SEE THE FRUIT OF HIS LABOR.
WHY----THIS MAN IS A BULLSHITTER. THERE ARE 3 TYPES OF MEN. BULLSHITTERS, BLUFFERS, AND SHO NUFFERS.
BULLSHITTERS TALK A GREAT GAME AND EVERY WEEK HAVE A NEW SCHEME OR PLAN TO GET MONEY, BUT THEY NEVER PRODUCE A STEADY STREAM OF INCOME THAT COULD SUPPORT A FAMILY OR EVEN THEMSELVES
BLUFFERS TALK A GREAT GAME AND EVEN HAVE MEDIOCRE SUCCESS AND THEY SPEND ALL THEIR INCOME SHOWING OFF TO THE WORLD THAT THEY MADE IT INSTEAD OF REINVESTING AND BUILDING UP THEIR NET WORTH. (I.E. THE GUY WITH A RANGE ROVER OR BENZ LIVING IN AN APT. NOT A CONDO OR HOME…THE GUY STILL AT HIS MOTHER'S CRIB AND SHE IS NOT SICK OR DISABLED….THE GUY WHO'S ALWAYS COMING TO YOUR PLACE BECAUSE HIS ROOMMATE HAS COMPANY THAT NIGHT, BUT HE DRIVES A CAR WITH RIMS WORTH MORE THAN THE CAR )
SHO NUFFERS TALK A GREAT GAME AND WALK A BETTER WALK. YOU SEE THE FRUIT OF THEIR LABOR. IT MAY NOT BE INSTANTANEOUS, BUT THEN AGAIN ROME NOR MICROSOFT WERE BUILT IN A DAY. THIS DUDE MAY NOT HAVE THE FLASHIEST GEAR OR CAR, BUT HE HAS A PLAN AND YOU CAN SEE IT DEVELOPING. THE WOMAN WHO FINDS THIS MAN AND STAYS LOYAL IS USUALLY REWARDED FOR GETTING IN ON THE GROUND FLOOR. EITHER THROUGH HIS LOYALTY AND DEVOTION OR THROUGH THE COURT BECAUSE OF COMMUNITY PROPERTY
5. A MAN OVER 27 WHO WEARS REAL DIAMONDS AND HAS THE HOTTEST CAR WITH THE HOTTEST RIMS, AND HAS THE HOTTEST BEDROOM WITH A PLASMA TV AT HIS MOTHER'S HOUSE.
WHY----NOT ONLY IS THIS MAN A BLUFFER, HE HAS NO RESPECT FOR YOU OR HIMSELF. WHAT ADULT MALE INVITES A WOMAN TO HIS MOTHER'S HOUSE TO HAVE SEX AND THINKS THAT IS RESPECTFUL? WHAT WOMAN FEELS COMFORTABLE LETTING HER INHIBITIONS GO, KNOWING THAT HIS MOTHER COULD KNOCK ON THE DOOR AT ANY MINUTE? UNLESS HIS MOTHER IS ILL, THIS MAN HAS ATTACHMENT ISSUES AND YOU NEED TO BE WEARY OF HIM.
6. A MAN WHO HAS MORE THAN 2 WOMEN WHO HE HAS FATHERED CHILDREN WITH
WHY----THIS MAN MAKES POOR DECISIONS. THE FIRST TIME MAY BE EXCUSABLE, THE SECOND TIME THINGS HAPPEN, BUT THE THIRD TIME YOU KNEW BETTER AND JUST AREN'T RESPONSIBLE. THIS MAN IS RECKLESS AND MOST LIKELY WILL HAVE BABY MOMMA DRAMA THROUGHOUT THE RELATIONSHIP. EVEN IF HE DOESN'T, HIS CHECK WILL ALMOST SURELY BE CUT IN HALF WHEN CHILD SUPPORT GETS HOLD OF HIM. DO YOU WANT TO BE ONE OF MANY?
7. A MAN WHO ANGERS EASILY
WHY----A MAN WHO ANGERS EASILY HAS A LOW TOLERANCE LEVEL. LIFE AS A MAN IS HARD. A REAL MAN KNOWS HOW TO STRAP UP WHEN THINGS GET HARD AND CARRY THE LOAD. HE DOESN'T BREAK DOWN AND SUBMIT TO EMOTION EASILY. HE DOESN'T BECOME FLUSTERED, BECAUSE A MAN WHO LOSES CONTROL OF HIS EMOTIONS IN CRUNCH TIME BECOMES A VICTIM. NO MATTER WHERE YOU ARE…THE STREETS OR THE BOARDROOM….A MAN WHO GIVES INTO ANGER EASILY IS A LIABILITY. THIS MAN IS PRONE TO MAKE RASH DECISIONS BASED ON ANGER AND COULD DESTROY EVERYTHING YOU HAVE BUILT IN THE BLINK OF AN EYE.
8. A MAN WHO CRIES EASILY TO HIS WOMAN
WHY----NO WOMAN WANTS A WEAK KNEE MAN. NO MATTER HOW IN TOUCH A MAN IS WITH HIS EMOTIONS, UNLESS YOUR MAN'S FAMILY MEMBER OR HIS BESTFRIEND DIES, YOU DON'T REALLY WANT TO SEE HIM CRY. IF HE CRIES WHEN THINGS GET ROUGH, WHO IS GONNA HOLD YOU WHEN YOU CRY? WHO WILL BE YOUR ROCK? AT SOME POINT, NO MATTER HOW OPEN YOU ARE, IF YOUR MAN KEEPS CRYING…YOU ARE GONNA THINK HE'S A BITCH ASS DUDE AND LOOK FOR A STRONGER MAN WITH A BACKBONE WHO SUCKS THINGS UP AND KEEPS IT MOVING. A WOMAN RESPECTS A MAN PRIMARILY FOR HIS STRENGTH AND CONFIDENCE….EVERYTHING ELSE IS SECONDARY.
9. A MAN WHO IS INVOLVED WITH ILLEGAL ACTIVITY
WHY----THIS MAN WILL PUT YOUR LIFE IN DANGER JUST BY BEING WITH YOU. THE STREETS TALK. THE EASIEST WAY TO GET TO A MAN DOING DIRT IS BY GETTING TO THOSE HE LOVES. THE POLICE KNOW THIS AND SO DO HIS ADVERSARIES. YOUR LIFE, YOUR CHILDREN'S LIFE AND YOUR FRIEND'S LIVES ARE ALL IN DANGER DUE TO THIS MAN. ANY MAN, WHO WOULD RISK HIS FAMILY FOR MONEY, DOESN'T TRULY RESPECT HIS FAMILY AND YOU SHOULD REMEMBER THAT. HE WILL CONTINUE DOING DIRT UNTIL THE CONSEQUENCES CATCH UP TO HIM OR HE BECOMES ENLIGHTENED
10. A MAN WHO DOES NOT LIKE THE SAME THINGS YOU DO OR DESIRE THE SAME POSITIVE THINGS IN LIFE AS YOU
WHY----RELATIONSHIPS ARE NOT JUST BUILT ON LOVE. IF LOVE WAS ENOUGH, MUST RELATIONSHIPS WOULD LAST. CERTAIN THINGS LIKE DESIRE FOR CHILDREN, DISCIPLINE OF CHILDREN, WHERE TO LIVE, AND LIFELONG CAREER DREAMS SHOULD BE SHARED AND AGREED UPON, NOT FORCED UPON SOMEONE. LONG LASTING RELATIONSHIPS ARE BUILT ON COMPATIBILITY. IF YOU DO NOT DESIRE THE SAME THINGS IN LIFE OR DO NOT LIKE THE SAME THINGS IN LIFE YOU WILL FIND YOURSELF COMPROMISING OR GIVING IN TO YOUR MATES DEMANDS. WHEN A PERSON DOES NOT FULFILL THEIR OWN DESIRES THEY WILL FESTER UNTIL SOMEONE AWAKENS THEM OR THEY HAVE CAUSED A CANCEROUS RESENTMENT INSIDE OF THE PERSON REPRESSING THEM. THESE REPRESSED DESIRES, TO DO AS YOU PLEASE AND LIVE AS YOU LIKE, MAY CAUSE YOU TO DESTROY WHAT YOU HAVE BUILT. IT IS BETTER TO BUILD A RELATIONSHIP WITH SOMEONE WHO YOU CAN ENJOY YOUR LIFE WITH BASED ON LIKE DESIRES, THAN TO BUILD IT WITH SOMEONE WHO LOOKS GOOD ON PAPER, BUT YOU HAVE TO GIVE IN TO THEIR DEMANDS AND YOU LOSE YOUR IDENTITY TO FIT THEIR MOLD.
1. A MAN WITHOUT A MORAL COMPASS
WHY---- WHETHER IT IS CHRISTIANITY, ISLAM, BUDDHISM, OR WHATEVER…. MOST ORGANIZED RELIGIONS STRESS HAVING A MORAL COMPASS AND HOW TO TREAT SOMEONE. EVEN IF YOUR MAN IS NOT RELIGIOUS HE NEEDS A MORAL COMPASS. A MAN WITHOUT A MORAL COMPASS WILL MOST LIKELY NOT RESPECT HIS WOMAN AND IS BEHOLDEN TO NO ONE. THIS MAN IS NOT PROHIBITED BY ANYTHING ONCE THEY FEEL THEY CAN ESCAPE SOCIETY'S LAW AND YOUR EYESIGHT….HE WILL CHEAT WITH ANYONE OR DO ANYTHING THAT FEELS PLEASURABLE.
2. A MAN WHO BELIEVES THAT HE HAS THE RIGHT TO TELL YOU WHERE TO GO, WHAT TO SAY, HOW TO ACT, WHAT TO WEAR, WHOM TO HANG AROUND, WHERE TO WORK, AND WHOM TO TALK TO
WHY----THIS MAN SEEKS TO CONTROL YOU. HE DOES NOT WANT A PARTNER HE WANTS A SUBORDINATE. YOU SHOULD MARRY A HUSBAND NOT YOUR FATHER. EVEN IF A MAN CAN GIVE YOU ADVICE TO BETTER YOUR LIFE IN AREAS YOU ARE WEAK, THAT ADVICE MUST BE WELCOMED AND EMBRACED. OTHERWISE, IT WILL FALL ON DEAF EARS AND RESENTMENT WILL BUILD INSIDE YOU TOWARDS HIM. YOU WILL LONG TO ESCAPE AND BE WITH SOMEONE WHO DOESN'T THINK THEY "KNOW EVERYTHING", AND THAT ESCAPE MAY LEAD YOU TO STRAY EMOTIONALLY AND EVENTUALLY MAYBE EVEN PHYSICALLY
3. A MAN WHO WOULD PUT HIS HANDS ON ANOTHER PERSON VERY EASILY
WHY----A MAN WHO WILL HIT SOMEONE ELSE EASILY, WILL ONE DAY HIT HIS WOMAN. THIS FOOL HAS LOST HIS EVER LOVING MIND AND DESERVES A ONE WAY TICKET TO THE HOSPITAL. IN TODAY'S SOCIETY TO PUT YOUR HANDS ON ANOTHER MAN WITHOUT FULLY UNDERSTANDING THE CONSEQUENCES DOESN'T MAKE YOU A THUG, IT MAKES YOU STUPID. THIS MAN HAS NO RESPECT FOR OTHER'S LIFE OR HIS OWN. HE IS A PRISONER OF HIS EMOTIONS AND HAS POOR IMPULSE CONTROL. HIS LACK OF IMPULSE CONTROL CAN LEAD HIM TO HITTING YOU(HIS WOMAN). IF A MAN EVER PUT HIS HANDS ON YOU AND IT HAS NOT BEEN PROVOKED BY A PHYSICAL ATTACK(AND I MEAN A SERIOUS PHYSICAL ATTACK), YOU MUST LEAVE HIM IMMEDIATELY AND NEVER LOOK BACK. HE IS A WEAK MAN AND CAN NOT BE TRUSTED. THIS MAN CAN NOT CONTROL HIS TEMPER AND ALL IT TAKES IS ONE PUNCH TO SEVERELY INJURE OR KILL A PERSON IF HE HITS YOU WRONG. LEAVE IMMEDIATELY AND NO MATTER HOW SORRY HE SAYS HE IS AND WHAT HE TRIES TO PROVIDE AS GIFTS….DO NOT GO BACK. ALL THE SORRIES IN THE WORLD CAN'T BRING YOU BACK IF YOU'RE DEAD OR BADLY INJURED.
4. A MAN WHO ALWAYS HAS A PLAN FOR SUCCESS BUT YOU NEVER SEE THE FRUIT OF HIS LABOR.
WHY----THIS MAN IS A BULLSHITTER. THERE ARE 3 TYPES OF MEN. BULLSHITTERS, BLUFFERS, AND SHO NUFFERS.
BULLSHITTERS TALK A GREAT GAME AND EVERY WEEK HAVE A NEW SCHEME OR PLAN TO GET MONEY, BUT THEY NEVER PRODUCE A STEADY STREAM OF INCOME THAT COULD SUPPORT A FAMILY OR EVEN THEMSELVES
BLUFFERS TALK A GREAT GAME AND EVEN HAVE MEDIOCRE SUCCESS AND THEY SPEND ALL THEIR INCOME SHOWING OFF TO THE WORLD THAT THEY MADE IT INSTEAD OF REINVESTING AND BUILDING UP THEIR NET WORTH. (I.E. THE GUY WITH A RANGE ROVER OR BENZ LIVING IN AN APT. NOT A CONDO OR HOME…THE GUY STILL AT HIS MOTHER'S CRIB AND SHE IS NOT SICK OR DISABLED….THE GUY WHO'S ALWAYS COMING TO YOUR PLACE BECAUSE HIS ROOMMATE HAS COMPANY THAT NIGHT, BUT HE DRIVES A CAR WITH RIMS WORTH MORE THAN THE CAR )
SHO NUFFERS TALK A GREAT GAME AND WALK A BETTER WALK. YOU SEE THE FRUIT OF THEIR LABOR. IT MAY NOT BE INSTANTANEOUS, BUT THEN AGAIN ROME NOR MICROSOFT WERE BUILT IN A DAY. THIS DUDE MAY NOT HAVE THE FLASHIEST GEAR OR CAR, BUT HE HAS A PLAN AND YOU CAN SEE IT DEVELOPING. THE WOMAN WHO FINDS THIS MAN AND STAYS LOYAL IS USUALLY REWARDED FOR GETTING IN ON THE GROUND FLOOR. EITHER THROUGH HIS LOYALTY AND DEVOTION OR THROUGH THE COURT BECAUSE OF COMMUNITY PROPERTY
5. A MAN OVER 27 WHO WEARS REAL DIAMONDS AND HAS THE HOTTEST CAR WITH THE HOTTEST RIMS, AND HAS THE HOTTEST BEDROOM WITH A PLASMA TV AT HIS MOTHER'S HOUSE.
WHY----NOT ONLY IS THIS MAN A BLUFFER, HE HAS NO RESPECT FOR YOU OR HIMSELF. WHAT ADULT MALE INVITES A WOMAN TO HIS MOTHER'S HOUSE TO HAVE SEX AND THINKS THAT IS RESPECTFUL? WHAT WOMAN FEELS COMFORTABLE LETTING HER INHIBITIONS GO, KNOWING THAT HIS MOTHER COULD KNOCK ON THE DOOR AT ANY MINUTE? UNLESS HIS MOTHER IS ILL, THIS MAN HAS ATTACHMENT ISSUES AND YOU NEED TO BE WEARY OF HIM.
6. A MAN WHO HAS MORE THAN 2 WOMEN WHO HE HAS FATHERED CHILDREN WITH
WHY----THIS MAN MAKES POOR DECISIONS. THE FIRST TIME MAY BE EXCUSABLE, THE SECOND TIME THINGS HAPPEN, BUT THE THIRD TIME YOU KNEW BETTER AND JUST AREN'T RESPONSIBLE. THIS MAN IS RECKLESS AND MOST LIKELY WILL HAVE BABY MOMMA DRAMA THROUGHOUT THE RELATIONSHIP. EVEN IF HE DOESN'T, HIS CHECK WILL ALMOST SURELY BE CUT IN HALF WHEN CHILD SUPPORT GETS HOLD OF HIM. DO YOU WANT TO BE ONE OF MANY?
7. A MAN WHO ANGERS EASILY
WHY----A MAN WHO ANGERS EASILY HAS A LOW TOLERANCE LEVEL. LIFE AS A MAN IS HARD. A REAL MAN KNOWS HOW TO STRAP UP WHEN THINGS GET HARD AND CARRY THE LOAD. HE DOESN'T BREAK DOWN AND SUBMIT TO EMOTION EASILY. HE DOESN'T BECOME FLUSTERED, BECAUSE A MAN WHO LOSES CONTROL OF HIS EMOTIONS IN CRUNCH TIME BECOMES A VICTIM. NO MATTER WHERE YOU ARE…THE STREETS OR THE BOARDROOM….A MAN WHO GIVES INTO ANGER EASILY IS A LIABILITY. THIS MAN IS PRONE TO MAKE RASH DECISIONS BASED ON ANGER AND COULD DESTROY EVERYTHING YOU HAVE BUILT IN THE BLINK OF AN EYE.
8. A MAN WHO CRIES EASILY TO HIS WOMAN
WHY----NO WOMAN WANTS A WEAK KNEE MAN. NO MATTER HOW IN TOUCH A MAN IS WITH HIS EMOTIONS, UNLESS YOUR MAN'S FAMILY MEMBER OR HIS BESTFRIEND DIES, YOU DON'T REALLY WANT TO SEE HIM CRY. IF HE CRIES WHEN THINGS GET ROUGH, WHO IS GONNA HOLD YOU WHEN YOU CRY? WHO WILL BE YOUR ROCK? AT SOME POINT, NO MATTER HOW OPEN YOU ARE, IF YOUR MAN KEEPS CRYING…YOU ARE GONNA THINK HE'S A BITCH ASS DUDE AND LOOK FOR A STRONGER MAN WITH A BACKBONE WHO SUCKS THINGS UP AND KEEPS IT MOVING. A WOMAN RESPECTS A MAN PRIMARILY FOR HIS STRENGTH AND CONFIDENCE….EVERYTHING ELSE IS SECONDARY.
9. A MAN WHO IS INVOLVED WITH ILLEGAL ACTIVITY
WHY----THIS MAN WILL PUT YOUR LIFE IN DANGER JUST BY BEING WITH YOU. THE STREETS TALK. THE EASIEST WAY TO GET TO A MAN DOING DIRT IS BY GETTING TO THOSE HE LOVES. THE POLICE KNOW THIS AND SO DO HIS ADVERSARIES. YOUR LIFE, YOUR CHILDREN'S LIFE AND YOUR FRIEND'S LIVES ARE ALL IN DANGER DUE TO THIS MAN. ANY MAN, WHO WOULD RISK HIS FAMILY FOR MONEY, DOESN'T TRULY RESPECT HIS FAMILY AND YOU SHOULD REMEMBER THAT. HE WILL CONTINUE DOING DIRT UNTIL THE CONSEQUENCES CATCH UP TO HIM OR HE BECOMES ENLIGHTENED
10. A MAN WHO DOES NOT LIKE THE SAME THINGS YOU DO OR DESIRE THE SAME POSITIVE THINGS IN LIFE AS YOU
WHY----RELATIONSHIPS ARE NOT JUST BUILT ON LOVE. IF LOVE WAS ENOUGH, MUST RELATIONSHIPS WOULD LAST. CERTAIN THINGS LIKE DESIRE FOR CHILDREN, DISCIPLINE OF CHILDREN, WHERE TO LIVE, AND LIFELONG CAREER DREAMS SHOULD BE SHARED AND AGREED UPON, NOT FORCED UPON SOMEONE. LONG LASTING RELATIONSHIPS ARE BUILT ON COMPATIBILITY. IF YOU DO NOT DESIRE THE SAME THINGS IN LIFE OR DO NOT LIKE THE SAME THINGS IN LIFE YOU WILL FIND YOURSELF COMPROMISING OR GIVING IN TO YOUR MATES DEMANDS. WHEN A PERSON DOES NOT FULFILL THEIR OWN DESIRES THEY WILL FESTER UNTIL SOMEONE AWAKENS THEM OR THEY HAVE CAUSED A CANCEROUS RESENTMENT INSIDE OF THE PERSON REPRESSING THEM. THESE REPRESSED DESIRES, TO DO AS YOU PLEASE AND LIVE AS YOU LIKE, MAY CAUSE YOU TO DESTROY WHAT YOU HAVE BUILT. IT IS BETTER TO BUILD A RELATIONSHIP WITH SOMEONE WHO YOU CAN ENJOY YOUR LIFE WITH BASED ON LIKE DESIRES, THAN TO BUILD IT WITH SOMEONE WHO LOOKS GOOD ON PAPER, BUT YOU HAVE TO GIVE IN TO THEIR DEMANDS AND YOU LOSE YOUR IDENTITY TO FIT THEIR MOLD.
From A Man to Women...Stand Up and Date Wisely
The common denominator in your relationship problems is not just the MEN, it's YOU!!!
What type of decisions are you making? Here are some real questions I want you to ask yourself when you are thinking about your relationships and the men you might date.
1. Are you still influenced by media stereotypes and unrealistic expectations?
Why: Unless you uniquely define your expectations of a partner, your relationship parameters, your roles in a relationship, and what you need to be happy you will forever be influenced by others and will never be satisfied with a partner or their attempts to make you happy.
2. What do you want out of this situation?
Why: If you don't know what you want, how will you know what to accept or ask for?
3. What do you want in a man?
Why: If you judge a man based on media expectations you will most certainly fail. The reason why relationships in the past worked is not because women were oppressed, women weren't as educated, independent, or strong. It was because women knew what to expect of men, they expected it, and played their role to counterbalance his. There was harmony in households, because both people weren't trying to have a battle of wills. They knew how to compromise on the major issues, not argue over the minor issues, and men let women win, because a woman knew how to make a man feel like a man so there was give and take. Just remember, if you decide not to play a stereotypical gender role for a man….why should he play one for you? Should he then not buy a engagement ring (exclusive to men), pick up the check at major meals(societal pressure is on the man), practice chivalry(was meant to balance a woman's societal place based on her gender), or protect you from harm (if all things are equal shouldn't you both run when in danger…lol). Just like removing prayer and God from the schools, if you take a key part of an institution away, make sure you are immediately able to replace it with something that yields the same results as the item replaced, or expect dysfunction.
4. What are your priorities in life?
Why: Do you want a family? Do you want to see your grandchildren? Is quality of life less important than the amount of materials possessions you acquire in life? Remember, just because you can have a child at 35 and 40 doesn't make it ideal. So what, you have a 30 year career…does it replace the love of a child? Does it replace the heartache felt by not having one? Just because some women can have children at 35 and older, doesn't mean every woman can. Fertility treatments are expensive. Remember, we are organisms. The next time you wonder if its nature or nurture, just ask yourself a simple question. What is necessary for the human race to continue to exist? If you're answer goes against that, then it's most likely a genetic defect or a learned behavior. Women are meant to reproduce at younger ages, not older ages. There is a large correlation between birth defects and the age of the mother. You can always shop, travel, or party…you are not promised to always be able to reproduce and have a healthy child.
5. Have you dealt with the baggage of your past relationships and failures?
Why: If you are still making the new person live up to higher standards based on something they did not do, please expect for them to see this and judge you accordingly. Some common examples of this are:
a. Setting a probationary period for sex
b. Refusing to go out unless it's to a nice restaurant or something exciting and different
c. Refusing to open your heart and trust your partner
d. Sabotaging the relationship by being needy or checking up on your partner
e. Trying to force your partner into making you the first priority(remember you either are or you aren't…it's their decision, don't force it)
With all this being said, think of your current situation. You are at this place in your life either due to purposeful decision or by default. Either way, you are responsible. Remember you had other choices in men. There were good, hardworking, educated, single men, with no children, and goals for the future. Remember, men like Barack Obama weren't the flavor of the month. He was not a sports star, he is not muscular, and he wasn't the coolest guy around by his own admissions. Yet, look at where he is now. There are many good men out there and you may be purposefully ignoring them because the media and society has refused to educate a lot of women on what a good man looks like...So now you ask...what does a good man look like....see the Blog "10 MEN EDUCATED WOMEN SHOULD NOT DATE"
What type of decisions are you making? Here are some real questions I want you to ask yourself when you are thinking about your relationships and the men you might date.
1. Are you still influenced by media stereotypes and unrealistic expectations?
Why: Unless you uniquely define your expectations of a partner, your relationship parameters, your roles in a relationship, and what you need to be happy you will forever be influenced by others and will never be satisfied with a partner or their attempts to make you happy.
2. What do you want out of this situation?
Why: If you don't know what you want, how will you know what to accept or ask for?
3. What do you want in a man?
Why: If you judge a man based on media expectations you will most certainly fail. The reason why relationships in the past worked is not because women were oppressed, women weren't as educated, independent, or strong. It was because women knew what to expect of men, they expected it, and played their role to counterbalance his. There was harmony in households, because both people weren't trying to have a battle of wills. They knew how to compromise on the major issues, not argue over the minor issues, and men let women win, because a woman knew how to make a man feel like a man so there was give and take. Just remember, if you decide not to play a stereotypical gender role for a man….why should he play one for you? Should he then not buy a engagement ring (exclusive to men), pick up the check at major meals(societal pressure is on the man), practice chivalry(was meant to balance a woman's societal place based on her gender), or protect you from harm (if all things are equal shouldn't you both run when in danger…lol). Just like removing prayer and God from the schools, if you take a key part of an institution away, make sure you are immediately able to replace it with something that yields the same results as the item replaced, or expect dysfunction.
4. What are your priorities in life?
Why: Do you want a family? Do you want to see your grandchildren? Is quality of life less important than the amount of materials possessions you acquire in life? Remember, just because you can have a child at 35 and 40 doesn't make it ideal. So what, you have a 30 year career…does it replace the love of a child? Does it replace the heartache felt by not having one? Just because some women can have children at 35 and older, doesn't mean every woman can. Fertility treatments are expensive. Remember, we are organisms. The next time you wonder if its nature or nurture, just ask yourself a simple question. What is necessary for the human race to continue to exist? If you're answer goes against that, then it's most likely a genetic defect or a learned behavior. Women are meant to reproduce at younger ages, not older ages. There is a large correlation between birth defects and the age of the mother. You can always shop, travel, or party…you are not promised to always be able to reproduce and have a healthy child.
5. Have you dealt with the baggage of your past relationships and failures?
Why: If you are still making the new person live up to higher standards based on something they did not do, please expect for them to see this and judge you accordingly. Some common examples of this are:
a. Setting a probationary period for sex
b. Refusing to go out unless it's to a nice restaurant or something exciting and different
c. Refusing to open your heart and trust your partner
d. Sabotaging the relationship by being needy or checking up on your partner
e. Trying to force your partner into making you the first priority(remember you either are or you aren't…it's their decision, don't force it)
With all this being said, think of your current situation. You are at this place in your life either due to purposeful decision or by default. Either way, you are responsible. Remember you had other choices in men. There were good, hardworking, educated, single men, with no children, and goals for the future. Remember, men like Barack Obama weren't the flavor of the month. He was not a sports star, he is not muscular, and he wasn't the coolest guy around by his own admissions. Yet, look at where he is now. There are many good men out there and you may be purposefully ignoring them because the media and society has refused to educate a lot of women on what a good man looks like...So now you ask...what does a good man look like....see the Blog "10 MEN EDUCATED WOMEN SHOULD NOT DATE"
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
